I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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