This is not my ceiling
I smell stomach acid.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
