Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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