I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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