she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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