I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
