fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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