I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize