I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
