i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am