I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize