they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
