IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
