Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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