i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
