oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize