So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
