Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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