whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Randomize
