when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
