at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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