the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Randomize
