About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
