The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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