Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
