Cold hands, warm shart.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I have already put on my inside pants.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
