the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
