Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
