I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
