K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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