yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?