What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
