I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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