I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
