If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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