Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
