Just fell off a train. Bad.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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