Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize