I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize