all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
