She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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