Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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