i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
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I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
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T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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