I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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