we have officially mastered the walk of shame
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
