I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
