Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
