I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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