Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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