You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
