Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
You're a waste of cheezeits
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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