Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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